As women business owners we are naturally more inclined to relationship building and helping others. You could say it is in our DNA.

We tend to communicate really well at all levels and we take other people’s interests to heart. It’s nothing for us to pick up the phone and hear from a friend how their day is going or whether their sickly child is on the mend.

I know of friends who phone their moms every single day and have a weekly coffee with their bestie.

I see all of these as soft selling skills. It’s all about building and developing relationships, and making our inner circle feel important.

The same could be said for our prospective clients as well as our current clients.

Take their interests to heart and soon you’ll have a very loyal following of believers who will punt your product or service to everyone they meet.

In my Virtual Assistant agency I take care to align our team with the best clients. Conversely, I take just as much care to ensure that our Virtual Assistants share the same vision and passion as us. It’s very important for me that my business, team and clients are all aligned. It’s a recipe for success!

Relationship building
There is a particular client in my VA Agency that I always refer back to. We haven’t had the privilege of meeting in person yet, however, we’ve had numerous conversations and I know that should we ever meet in person that we could spend hours over a cup of coffee chatting about everything under the sun.

You see, this client represents my client avatar, my ideal client for this particular business. And because we are so well aligned he has already referred us to a handful of business associates. Plus, he has engaged in the services of our other businesses. This serves as a prime example of building a great relationship through soft selling skills.

Need help in developing your soft selling skills? Here are a few tips for you.

  1. You need to be an effective communicator.
  2. Your mind-set should be of that constant growth.
  3. Always be coachable, be willing to keep learning.
  4. Be emotionally intelligent. This means that you have emotional awareness (and this is key to being successful), you are self-confident and you show leadership skills.

Actioning soft sales skills

– Phone calls: Pick up the phone every day and call 6 people. 2 ex-clients, 2 current clients and 2 future clients.
– Blogs: Share interesting articles and other great reads with your team, your prospective client list and your current client base. Make sure that it is pertinent to their business and of value.
– Extra mile: Go the extra mile for a team member’s birthday or your client’s birthday. Take them for a cup of coffee. If this is not possible, then send them a gift voucher and a message online.
– Give back: Give back by coaching fellow team members and helping the community where it is appropriate through your business. Remember word-of-mouth is still powerful, so make sure that your brand is seen everywhere but remains 100% intact.

Why do I keep referring back to team members when we’re talking about soft sales skills?

Quite simply, your team are your closest set of brand ambassadors. Treat your team well, empower them and make them part of the sales process, and they will tell the world how amazing you and your business are.

Bringing it together
Soft sales skills are taking natural abilities and enhancing them to make your sales process a more pleasant and fun one. If you’re great at chatting, why not go out of your way to invite a prospective client for a coffee and a chat about how you can help him without any hard selling?

Use your talents and maximise them to not only grow your business but to also increase your sales skills in a natural and uplifting way.

Happy selling!

Karen has facilitated and hosted many sales masterclasses, workshops and training sessions to not only boost sales confidence however to also instill sales skills and tools that are personalised to each individual. To learn more visit her website on or contact her directly on